Sex only occurs in the mind.

BDSM is an ideology, and like all ideologies, it works backward from desired conclusions. This is how expressions that are so obviously meaningless, like “abuse is not BDSM” can be so easily accepted as having meaning. Starting with an ideal or a conclusion and then creating its justification means that you perceive reality with self-imposed blinders. read more

Mastering others requires power, mastering yourself requires strength.

I haven’t blogged in a while because Mommy and I have been busy vacationing. We began with a sailing trip on a nearby lake. As we rode the schooner, we drank wine, and the weather was perfect, sunny, warm, but with a steady breeze that refreshed. We concluded the vacation with a day-long visit to an upscale spa, spending most of our time drinking wine and cocktails in a large, outdoor, hot massage pool that has natural rock waterfalls. read more

I honor her by my own annihilation

I have been reflecting on the nature of service and its implications. I am of course speaking of service in personal relationships, not as part of financial transactions. Outwardly, it appears that the servant performs a task, so the person served does not have to expend effort on that task. The benefits and the beneficiary are clearly apparent. read more

I am no longer alone among the others…

I have a life that by all appearances seems normal, even good. I own a home. I have a career. My work has significant responsibilities, and I am compensated well for it. I am physically fit, healthy and conventionally attractive. I have a good sense of humor and like to have fun. By many objective measures, I would appear to be successful in life. read more